Robert Frost.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood

and sorry I could not travel both

and be one traveler, long I stood

and looked down one as far as I could

to where it bent in the undergrowth.

then took the other, as just as far

because it was grassy and wanted wear

though as for that, the passing there

had worn them really about the same.

and both that morning equally lay

in leaves no step had trodden black

oh, kept the first for another day!

yet knowing how way leads to way

I doubted I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

somewhere ages and ages hence:

two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I-

I took the one less traveled by

and that has made all the difference.

.Robert Frost.

Question of the Week. [2 weeks ago]

Every week I have a question of the week for all the patients I see daily at my work. A couple weeks ago I offered up this question:

What do you think is one of the most important qualities in a woman? [I asked women about women.]

Here are some of their responses:

• empathy
• submission to God
• A love for her family’
• a gentle and quiet spirit
• indpenedence
• abiltity to forgive and forget
• meekness [this I got a few times]
• proper Biblical understanding of her role
• selflesness
• strong character
• honesty [this I got the most]
• patience
• compassion
• tolerance
• helpfulness
• physicaly healthy
• self-esteem
• a big heart
• freedom

I then asked men the same question, but in regards to men:

What do you think is one of the most important qualities a man should have?

• commitment
• kindness
• consideration of others [this came from a retireree of the U.S. Army after 20+ yrs of service]
• verablly affirming
• communicate emotions
• honesty
• teachable spirit
• wisdom
• humility
• willingness to do what others want as opposed to doing what you want

I was then given this little quote from a rather fascinating patient:

” Learning is the appropriation of knowledge, widsom is the application.”

Another question I asked [which I borrowed from a good friend] is the following:

What is something you know now that you wish you knew when you were 20?

• I wish I’d realized the importance of self-esteem
• I wish I’d realized that I am a good person and didn’t have to change myself for a boy.
• I wish I’d realized the importance of being a giving person.
• I wish I’d been more patient with others.
• I wish I’d invested my money better.
• I wish I’d bought more stocks.
• I wish I’d done everything I wanted to do before I got married.

I suppose its impossible to grow up and not have ‘I wish’ moments…but listening to patients that open up and share the story behind their ‘I wish’ creates in me a better awareness of the choices I make and the results that choice may produce. Think before you speak, act, don’t act..think before you think eh?

People are so facinating aren’t they?

Get out there, ask someone a question. Ask. Listen. Learn. Remember. People like to be remembered, everyond deserves to be heard.

Cheers! 

.:.kvandeway

Things That Roll Through My Head.

.:. I think I might have been better off in the days when burning your bra’s, dreading your hair and running through a field of wild flowers in a free shirt and shorts was more acceptable .:.

.:. I really dislike the response ‘ditto’ and I always have. Its lazy and makes one feel awkwardly vulnerable .:.

.:. Life is Good is one of my favorite companies and I gladly pay too high of a price to own their shirts .:.

.:. My mother is a lovely lady and has made such a lovely, cozy sewing room for her and I, for this I’m super thankful .:.

.:. Should I go spend 3 months off the coast of Alaska on a fishing vessel working 14 hour days with a ship full of scary men? [or] Should I take off for 10 months and live and work on an organic farm in New England? [or] Should I chock those idea’s up to my tendency to want to run from tough times, and just stay right where I am? .:.

.:. Did that guy really just stand there and tell me how fat he thinks his daughter is?! .:.

.:. I will never be able to grasp how some peoples minds work and the effects it has on millions of children around the nation…around the world…every day .:.

.:. Life is Hard, God is good .:.

.:. I can’t wait to play piano well again. It’s one of the most relaxing, mind easing practices I know and a much needed release these days .:.

.:. I’m thankful for the many people who love me for who I am and challange me to be a better being .:.

.:. Ben, I wish you were still here for an inumarable amount of reasons but a few being: because my heart wouldn’t ache so much. Because you had a weird and quarky sense of humor like me and I miss that. Because we could walk around the country and take pictures of things, then load them on the computer and you could make it look like I had talent Because you kept me in check when I would be to judgemental and opinionated. Because you loved people better than I and I had so much more I wanted to learn from you! Because you cared about politics enough for the both of us so it mattered less if I didn’t vote Oh…and you were willing to educate me on politics and photoshop..two things that feel like pulling teeth to me but can be helpful to know about. Because YOU were one of the brightest spots in my life and now that spot is dim.. .:.

.:. Clementines are close to my favorite seasonal fruit .:.

.:. Charlie Browns Christmas will never get old for me .:.

.:. I don’t know why some things are such a big deal. Look around you…so many other MORE important things to get your underwear in a knot about folks .:.

.:. I wonder what the trick is to earning your respect and friendship. Right now its more like a business aquaintance who thinks I’m funny because I trip a lot .:.

.:. “There’s nothing sexier than a woman who just won $3700 in nickels.” .:.

.:. “God is easy to please, but hard to satisfy.” C.S.Lewis .:.

.:. Do I want to know what life will look like in two years? .:.

…kvandeway…

A Hike on an Autumn Day

My parents, a friend and I took an afternoon to hike at Pokagen last Sunday. It happened to be one of the most perfect hiking days I could’ve imagined. Here’s a few pictures I took that day.

 

.:.kvandeway.:.

Thanksgiving 2009

My Dear Sister Anna Banana:) Alias: Nancy.

My Goregous Mother, Colleen Anne:) Alias: Cate, Kathleen ;0)

Good Ol’ Grandpa:) Talkin to our West Coast Family..

My Great Dad:) Also known as: Strider ;0)

My Hilarious bro Javas:) Alias: Flavis, Brother Bear..

My Awesome Brother-in-Law Aaron! I like to call him Flaaron though:)

This is what I look like on Thanksgiving ha…:)

Cran Juice and Sprite, a staple beverage on the holidays around this house:)

An Orchid, in honor of Grandma.

A Message.

To compile a complete list of all the things I have to be thankful for would be impossible. I find myself incapable of fully expressing how thankful, how blessed I am by so many people in my life, as this year comes to a close. Last Thanksgiving, if I’d been told what my life would look like today, I would’ve not believed it. (Yes, thats a cliche saying, but I find it to be incredibly true for me.) So much loss to start our a year, but so much gain to start out a great season of life.

Thank You, Father, for my life..

Much Love to Everyone,

.:.kvandeway.:.

Angel

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
There’s always one reason
To feel not good enough
And it’s hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I’ll find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there

So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
There’s vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It don’t make no difference
Escaping one last time
It’s easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here
-Sarah McLachlan

Overheard at Work.

So every day I have a ‘Question of the Day’ for the patients at work. Today I revisted some oldies when I had a new patient. Here’s how the conversation went:

Me: So! If you could eliminate one smell from the planet what would it be?

Patient: Hmm…the stench coming from Washington DC.

Me: BAHAHAHA!

 

The End.

.:kvandeway

So Fill To Me The Parting Glass…

“Of all the money that ere I had, I spent it in good company.
And of all the harm that ere I’ve done, alas was done to none but me.
And all I’ve done for want of wit, to memory now I cannot recall.
So fill me to the parting glass. Goodnight and joy be with you all.

Of all the comrades that ere I had, they’re sorry for my going away,
And of all the sweethearts that ere I had , they wish me one more day to stay,
But since it falls unto my lot that I should rise while you should not,
I will gently rise and I’ll softly call, “Goodnight and joy be with you all!”

Oh, if I had money enough to spend and leisure time to sit awhile
There is a fair maid in this town that sorely has my heart beguiled
Her rosey cheeks and ruby lips, she alone has my heart in thrall.
So fill me to the parting glass. Goodnight and joy be with you all.”

 

Ladybugs and Cranberry Tea.

.:.And so it is Ladybug Season. They whirl and twirl about on the sunniest side of the house, soaking up the last bit of warmth this year has to offer. Sitting outside on the Evening Porch while I write, I haven’t decided if I find it charming that they keep flying about my head, crawling on my laptop and occasionally peeing ladybug pee on my hand. 10 minutes ago when I got out here I thought it was whimsical and a bit charming…right now I see that feeling is starting to fade…quickly. Did you ever realize that Ladybugs emit a smell of dirt and mothballs. Yep, they do indeed. Its so…natural..:0/

I spent a lot of time in the kitchen today:) What better way to spend a sick day off of work than to make other people food? Ha…hmm…well nevertheless I made a pretty kick-butt White Bean Chicken Chili, Roasted Red Pepper Hummus (from scratch!) and this seasons first batch of Cranberry Tea. Oh man does the kitch smell good! It gets me pumped for this weekend and all the cookin that’ll happen. That is..if it doesn’t decide to rain on us. I have hope! The weather man isn’t paid for his accuracy I’ve come to realize, and for once I would be greatful if he was consistant.

I took a walk with God today, He mostly listened as I vented and apologized for venting. I have spent many a day now mulling about so many things in my mind. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Will they ever end? I think not. Conclusions! Oh what wonderful things those are! I have come to a conclusion or two at the end of my day…unexpectedly so but conclusions just the same. I believe I’ve come to a conclusion about school, being faced with what I ought not to do and what I ought to do, then trying to figure out how to make all of it happen. God has answered the prayers prayed for clarity. I have come to another conclusion: To live the way you so desire, takes hard work, commitment, strategy and faith. All of those things are good for one to practice so practice I shall! Dreams: here I come! Slowly, but surely.

Okay. Whimsical flight of the lady bugs is now an annoying torpedo peeing on my sweater. Time to sit in the shade and away from these crack head insects. Bah!

-kvandeway

To Be Foolish. [A Pictureless Post.]

Hmmm…the close to a very blessed day is bittersweet at times.

It’s 10 o’clock in the evening of October 13 and I have a peace about me. This day was blessed, it was centered, it was focused, it was productive, it was refreshing and it leaves me quite content. Don’t you love those days that leave you feeling prepared to face your week? You go to bed believing that when you wake up the next morning you will feel invigorated and ready to walk out the door with your confidence intact, your lunch pail full, your gas tank empty and your schedule still packed but its okay! Because you left the house with confidence:) Tomorrow, my greatest goal is to enjoy each hour I’m at work, spread a smidge of joy to each patient I encounter, contain my road rage while I commute to each location and deliver a pie uneaten and smelling delicious. If all of that is accomplished, I will yet again go to sleep content.

Can I just list the things that filled my day? Let me just do that this once, not with the intent of making the internet a personal journal space, but more so because this day could be described as the kind of day that ‘makes me tick’. (I sure hope you know what I mean by that haha..cause it could create a weird image in your mind if you don’t!)

.:Sleeping late! (8 o’clock:) .:hot tea waiting for me on the stove .:drizzly, chilly, overcast weather gracing my town .:hot eggs fresh from the skillet with all the right seasonings .:cleaning up my room .:starting laundry .:making a To Do List that I thought I could very nearly accomplish .:writing out a prayer list to tape to my windowsill .:a surprise visit from a dear friend and his little tike along with a surprise bag of apples for my pie:) .:accomplishing my academic goals for the day .:Bible time -hanging new pictures .:forgetting about lunch until my stomach was a’grumblin .:getting my job shadow approved and accepted! .:having open, honest communication between Mom and I, being shown ways I need to change, ways I could grow .:unloading Gramps groceries and taking a brisk walk home, having the best talk with God I’ve had in a long time and feeling alive with joy at the beautiful Autumn colors .:collecting eggs .:listening to a lecture while working on my carpel tunnel in my hand (otherwise known as cutting out felt Bible people) .:popping in my favorite movie of all time on my laptop in the kitchen while I started my Papa’s Apple Pie, 100% made with joy, from scratch .:the smell of baking apple pie throughout the house .:visiting with my folks -tucked away in my room, reading a book, listening to the sporadic tick of the space heater that’s taking the bite out of the air:) .:the feeling of a content heart and mind on a  Monday evening…

This is a day to be Thankful for. This is a day of Thanksgiving:) I so often wish that I could live days like this over because I enjoyed it so much, because it was one of those days I daydream about when I’m very well sick of being stuck in a building all day, breathing artificial air and feeling jealous of the freedom of the wind and that it blows whichever way it wishes. It was one of the those days I daydream about sometime in July when its a million degree’s out with not a cloud in the sky and the black top is so hot its creating the heat wave effect you see if you look closely. It was one of the those days I daydream about when I’m overwhelmed, unsure of my choices behind and decisions ahead, not to mention the every nagging event of being a female in the first place;0)

Yes indeed…a day I am thankful for.

Philippians 4:11-13

“…for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”

 Cheers!

.:kvandeway